"Washing at dawn: Rinse away dreams.
Protect the gods within, and clarify the inner spirit."
~ DENG MING-DAO
I have been conflicted about this writing business for a year or more. My friends have graciously put up with my fits and starts, even the folks at writing.com, where my conflicted feelings came to a head last week, hoping, I assume, that I would find the muse and continue the adventures. Sadly, that hasn't happened, and reconciliation with that cantankerous creature drifts farther away every day.
I can write articles about the abstract concepts of the craft or the characters, plots, and situations in my old books, but when I get out all my materials and try to produce new copy, be it outlining or words on the page, it fades into the background cacophony of things that are of much greater interest to me. Those things include the constantly developing strategy for my ongoing XCOM campaign, what to do with my postage-stamp yard come spring, or what old movies Mama and I might want to cuddle up in front of... Anything but writing!
The facts are these: I have a trilogy in print, and a short story that proved of sufficient quality for an editor to include it in his anthology. Whatever shadowy point I set out to prove when I began my quest for publication has been made, and I feel no further pressure nor even the slightest urge to continue on that path. I have been wasting hours a day pretending to be a writer, and that needs to stop; it stops here. I'm sorry. It looks like "Me" isn't coming back.
In the future, this will be my blog. Forget writing.com, forget WordPress, forget FaceBook even. This will be the face I present to the world. Will it be profound? Absolutely not! I'm not that person. Over the years I have been masquerading as a "Perfessional Awther," I have made a number of friends. Hopefully they well see fit to maintain those friendships with my post-writing persona, and this will provide an open door for those friendships, and maybe even some new ones.
The last question to be answered, then, is what will appear here if not writing-related content? Hard to say. I might do a spread on my garden, visit a historic site, post new recipes I've come up with, or make a funny beagle video, I just don't know. I'll endeavor to make it regular, and I'll certainly try to keep it interesting, but I'm not going to burden myself with planning. As some of my writing friends say, I'll be flying by the seat of my pants! I hope it goes well.